A Lifetime Journey of Fueling Mistakes

It's helpful to know what your stomach can tolerate before a run—even that backfires sometimes.

During the 2023 New York City Marathon, Runner’s World set up shop in an empty storefront on West 57th Street with Adidas and hosted three days of inspiring talks, shakeout runs, and shoe demos.

Because of a last-minute cancellation by one guest speaker, I was called in to talk about nutrition. This was bound to be interesting. See, around the office, I’m known for doing things in unconventional or even questionable ways. I’ll go on long runs without any water or gels. At lunch, I’m more likely to grab McDonald’s or a gas station hoagie than a salad. Sometimes it works—sometimes it doesn’t. But I know the sage advice this magazine dispenses, even if I don’t heed it in my daily running life.

For the duration of the nutrition panel, I did as instructed. But purely for your entertainment, I offer a sampling of questionable fueling strategies and gastronomical gaffes that I have jotted down in my training log over the past couple of decades.

In case it’s not clear by now: You’re better off not following my example!

A new marathon PR! By nearly 5 minutes. Wasn’t sure what was going to happen today, really. I hadn’t slept well the last few nights. Plus, I ate a brisket sandwich for dinner and Pepto-Bismol for dessert last night.

10/15/2014 Seven Miles: 

Note to self: Buffalo chicken pizza is a no-go if running after work. Great run with G.H., but I had some stomach issues 2 miles from the end and had to jump into the bushes. Not fun. The run, however, was.

9/20/2009 Adirondack Marathon: 

One to forget. I was moving along well and was in second place overall for the first 22 miles. But had trouble keeping fluids down today and couldn’t keep it together when I got warm on the front half of the course. Maybe I shouldn’t eat a sausage sandwich at midnight before the race next year.

5/5/2017 Taco Mile: 

I spent $129 at Taco Bell today. Filled 2 Ikea bags. Eat a taco, run a lap, repeat. That was fun. I was slow. But it was still a lot of fun.

10/11/2021 Boston Marathon: 

Had lots of support out there. Frank gave me his mimosa at mile 18. 

5/20/2020 Seven Miles: 

Burping up the egg and pork roll sandwich I ate for lunch. Whoops.

6/16/2017 Beer Mile: 

Fourth lap, beer going down good, but I started laughing when Kit yakked. I nearly did myself, but spewed a mouthful of beer, earning myself a penalty lap. Damn.

12/2/2019 Four Miles: 

Got a late start to the day, but sneaked out for a lunch run. A good snowfall. Stopped at Burger King on my way back home. 2 for $6 Whoppers. Yay.

2/4/2024 19 Miles Long Run: 

Felt hungry when I ran past a 7-11, so I stopped in for a donut (and Gatorade).

11/10/2017 Five Miles: 

Ate a chicken Caesar wrap too late in the day. Vomited a little on the Brooklyn Bridge and nearly pooped my tights. Oof. 

12/21/2015 Seven Miles: 

We went to Joe’s Shanghai for a work holiday lunch. 1:30 reservation means I burped up dumplings for 7 miles after work. Not fun.

posted Sunday July 28th